Starting Where You’re At with Joel Byars
“you don't have to wait for someone's approval to create”
In this week’s episode, I’m so excited to introduce you to Joel Byars, a comedian, podcaster, and writer based in Atlanta, GA. He has won both the Kenan Thompson Comedy Contest and Search for the One Competition, has been a writer for Comedy Central and The Weather Channel, and even the author of his own book, Finding Your Funny. He is the host of the award winning podcast, Hot Breath! Which features over 400 interviews with comedians like Jeff Foxworthy and Cedric the Entertainer talking all about the craft of comedy.
In this episode we talk about how to set small incremental goals to build upon, recognizing the source of where you’re getting advice from, what inspires him, how to battle self doubt and comparison, being grateful for where you are, the importance mediation and therapy has had on his life in the past two years, how he took what he wanted and created it himself and so much more.
I hope you enjoy our conversation and if anything that Joel says resonates with you, please share this episode on Instagram and tag me @levelupwithshay and Joel @joelbyarscomedy.
Thank you so much for being here. It’s time to level up.
Subscribe to Level Up! With Shay wherever you get your podcasts.
Joel Byar’s Links
Comedy Instagram: www.instagram.com/joelbyarscomedy/
Hot Breath! Instagram: www.instagram.com/HotBreathPod/
Hot Breath! Podcast: apple.co/3wSR4U0
Hot Breath! YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/HotBreathPod
The Trophy Husband: https://www.joelbyarscomedy.com/
Level Up! With Shay Links
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Timestamps
5:34 - Joel found his life’s purpose
8:33 - Joel’s secret to overcoming nerves
10:43 - You have to put in the work to make it
14:10 - How to set goals
17:58 - Be selective about the people you listen to
20:42 - How Joel created a more positive and supportive comedy community
29:44 - Focus on what you can control
37:13 - Inspire others to take action
41:26 - Talk your goals into existence
42:37 - If you want it, create it for yourself
44:46 - Start from where you are
47:16 - How Joel is leveling up through therapy and meditation
54:21 - Shiny object syndrome
55:04 - Follow what excites you
57:37 - Only do things that are fun (yes, you heard that right!)
Transcription
Shay 0:00 (intro) Hello and welcome to Level Up! With Shay. I am a comedian, entrepreneur, and lover of personal growth here to share stories on my level up journey, bring other fascinating and inspirational artists and creatives to share their story and to help you realize your potential, take action, and fulfill your biggest dreams.
I’m so excited to introduce you to today’s guest, Joel Byars.
Joel is a comedian, podcaster, and writer based in Atlanta, Georgia. He has a unique clean comedy style and he has won both the Kenan Thompson Comedy Contest and Search for the One Competition which seek out the top clean comedians in the country. Joel has been a writer for Comedy Central, The Weather Channel, and even the author of his own book, Finding Your Funny. He is the host of the award winning podcast, Hot Breath! Which features over 400 interviews with comedians like Jeff Foxworthy and Cedric the Entertainer talking all about the craft of comedy. The Hot Breath! Podcast is on YouTube with over 20,000 subscribers and There is a Hot Breath! Facebook group with over 5000 members. He released a self-produced comedy special two years ago called The Trophy Husband. And he also offers other comedy classes and other workshops for aspiring comedians. In this episode we talk about how to set small incremental goals, recognizing the source of where you’re getting your advice from, what inspires him, how he took what he wanted and created it himself and so much more.
Joel says he always tries to remember to start from where he is at, right now, and he hopes to inspire others through his actions.
Please welcome to Level Up! With Shay, Joel Byars.
Hello, everyone, and welcome to Level Up! With Shay.
I'm so excited for today's guest and I could tell by his face he's very excited as well, Joel Byars.
Joel Byars 1:57
Oh my gosh. Thanks for having me, Shay.
Shay 1:59
Yeah, absolutely. I'm so excited. I remember I came to one of your open minds. I don't know why I haven't come to more but one of them. And I had one joke that killed. I am the lesbian Joel Byers.
Joel Byars 2:15
(laughs) The bar was very low. We were performing in a parking lot in the middle of COVID. So the bar was very low. So you did great. It was great to meet you there too. That was the best part about the open mic is getting to connect and keep in touch.
Shay 2:31
Yeah, yeah, for sure. I love that open mic. That's where I got the nickname Thick Ellen. So it was a very big moment for me.
Joel Byars 2:41
I've been called Ellen as well so don't worry about it.
Shay 2:45
I'm so excited to talk to you. Like I mentioned, I did some research and just kind of looked up what you've been doing the past 11 years or so. And while you have so many things going on, it's so cool. I want to know more. So I really want to start out at the beginning. You started comedy about 11 years ago, ish and what made you get into comedy? What was that kind of catalyst?
Joel Byars 3:13
I started my second semester, senior year of college. So I was about to graduate. And I'd always wanted to try comedy. And then as I was about to go into the real world, as an adult, I was like, "Well, maybe I should try this thing I've always thought about?" and then as soon as I tried it, that was it for me. You know, it was like taking the blue pill. As soon as I did stand up. That's exactly what I knew I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Now to actually get there, you know, took a lot longer to make it your actual job. But as soon as I did it, it's always something I had a passion for and then I actually did it. And this has been my life ever since.
Shay 3:51
Yeah and what did you study in college?
Joel Byars 3:52
Organizational management, with a minor in economics, not to brag, but it was a liberal arts degree. So, you can take that with a grain of salt that it was the degree is really just the receipt. If you go to a liberal arts school, that's really it. But it was a great experience. And I think it really cultivated the mindset to pursue your dreams and make them your career. So it was all worth it.
Shay 4:21
Yeah. Okay. And you wanted to go to college? Like that was the thing? You're like, "This is the next step". That was your decision?
Joel Byars 4:28
Yeah, yeah. I mean, now, you know, I'm an old head. I'm 34 so back in my day college was still part of like, "Well, this is the next thing." So now that the dialogue seems to be a little bit different around that, and it seems to be more of a case by case but there wasn't another option really. It seemed like college was just the next thing that you're supposed to do in life.
Shay 4:55
Yeah, that's so true. I mean, I'm 31 and I think my parents are educators and they wanted me to go to college. But yeah, at the same time, there were so many other people who I follow on social media, I'm like, "Oh, they didn't go to college because they knew there was another option." We kind of were just like, "Yeah, this is the one option." But yeah, a lot of things have changed since then and there's many other options besides college.
Joel Byars 5:24
Yeah, if I didn't do comedy, if I wasn't about to graduate in like two months, I probably would have dropped out. As soon as I did comedy, I knew exactly what my life's purpose was. Now, I've heard I think Brian Regan dropped out of college, like the week of graduation after doing comedy. So there are those cases as well. But I stuck it out. I finished the drill. But honestly, like, if it was earlier in my college crowd, I probably would have dropped out.
Shay 5:55
Yeah and what was that getting into comedy? Did you just show up at an open mic? Did somebody tell you about, "Hey, we have open mics come and join." How did that start?
Joel Byars 6:07
Yeah, it was basically, just like Google. I just searched "where are there open mics in the area?". Now there are comedy scenes everywhere. And there's Facebook groups for every comedy scene. So a comic can really just search "Atlanta comedy scene", "Denver comedy scene", "Birmingham comedy scene" and find open mics there. And there's resources online. But I think for me, it was just a Google and there was a local comedy club that was doing an open mic twice a month. So I just emailed them. And what's funny about doing comedy, is you just never know. That's why it's always so important, just in life to be nice, and all that. But in comedy, you never know who's gonna be who. You just never know, this person that you were mean to now runs a club or now books the best shows in the area. And they don't forget that you were mean to them for no reason, because they made you go up later at that open mic, and you deserve more, because you're the "chosen one" of comedy. Bridget, the person who booked me on that first open mic, we ended up doing shows several years later in Chattanooga, so it came full circle, but it all started with an email to then getting on stage in front of seven people. Three of them were the staff. And it was a lot of polite smiling, and just enough to keep the comedy dreams alive.
Shay 7:32
Yeah, I'm just curious, what made you Google it? Like how did you know, "Okay, this is, this is what I want to do."
Joel Byars 7:39
I mean I went and watched a few open mics here in the Atlanta area, and was kind of getting "the feel" that way. And then, when I went back to school, I got a stand up book, and Steve Martin's book, and read those and wrote some material. And then when I felt ready to actually take the lead to actually be like, "Alright, I'm gonna go up there and do this" and then that just seemed, you know, everything is now, our life is on Google. So I figured that would be the best place to start and found the club and then the rest is history, including the club. The club is now closed, maybe because they're open mics had seven people at them, but it was all a positive experience.
Shay 8:24
And were you scared to get on stage? I mean, it sounded like you were ready. You're like, "I'm gonna do this. I'm ready." Were you scared to get on stage and tell jokes?
Joel Byars 8:33
Oh, yeah. I mean, it was very nerve wracking. I mean, oh, my gosh. I had my notes. And I was reading over them. And I had rehearsed them over and over and over again. And yeah, I mean, I was definitely nervous. And I just remember getting off just feeling this high I had never felt before. I was almost electrified. I was just buzzing so much from doing stand up. But yeah, the nerves. I mean, oh my gosh, I'll still get nervous before a show, you know, especially if it's like, I did a show in a theater two weeks ago. And I haven't really done that many theater shows. And this was 750 people. And it was in front of an audience I'd never been in front of before. And I was nervous and I had to remember that I'm prepared. And I deserve to be here and just remember to take a breath. But what helps me through any nerves or anything is just knowing that I'm prepared. Knowing that I have a set that I know will do well here and just reminding myself despite these nerves that I am prepared for this opportunity and to make the most of it. But the nerves can still be there for sure.
Shay 9:43
I love that because when I go to open mics, I've learned that, oh, wow, I'm so much more comfortable when I'm prepared, when I actually practice. Not just write down talking points, but talk through my set. A few months ago I took Lace Larrabee's stand up class.
Joel Byars 10:05
Yeah, oh, Lace is great.
Shay 10:07
And she was on the podcast a few weeks ago.
Joel Byars 10:10
I heard it. I heard it. I peeped that. I'm leveling up with Shay over here. I'm here. (laughs)
Shay 10:15
I love that. I love it. But yeah, we basically transcribed our five-seven minute set. And we kind of practice that. When I first started going to open mics, I would see people just have their notes and then just kind of talk about it. And I was assuming they were talking about it, who knows? But then I was like, "Oh, that's what I can do." But really, for me, I want to be more prepared than just a talking point.
Joel Byars 10:43
Yeah, I mean, I think that's something a lot of newer comics think that they can outsmart the work, or they think that they're the chosen one and the rules don't apply to them. But you really have to learn the rules before you break them. So a lot of young comics here like Bill Burr, "Well, I write on stage." And they're like, "Well, I can write on stage because I've been doing comedy two months, and he's been doing it over 30 years. We're the same level." But it really comes down to just learning the rules first. Learning the fundamentals. How do you write a joke? How do you structure a joke? How do you structure a good five minute set? How do you perform and learn to review and refine that set and then go retry again, on stage. There's such a meticulous process to developing jokes. And comedy is like more popular than ever. And there's so much information about comedy out there that people think, they take the work for granted. And they want to do everything but the work. They want to have the cool headshots and they want to have the press kit and the good real and all this but it starts one joke at a time, one attempt at a time on stage. And you just build it that way. Early on my setlist were a transcription. I would sit here, I used to write in pencil, I thought it was cool. And then I would just sit before the show and transcribe my set word for word. And now I do more like bullet points and things like that. But now I have, "I want to do this joke. I want to say it this way, like in this brazen." Now, I want to say all that to say everyone's different. Sure, you may be a prodigy, and you may be able to go up there and talk or whatever. But every single level, you're seeing a comic doing they're special, that they know exactly where they're going. They know exactly every word for word, what they're gonna say in that special. So, even if they quote right on stage, they still have a script, they still know what they're going to say and know what joke leads into the next. I'll still go out and do open mics and still develop material for when I go on the road and stuff and I do see a lot of younger comics, just thinking, you know, "I'll just keep saying this until it magically gets better." But no, I mean, you write your joke, you perform it, you review the results, and then you refine it, you keep building it out that way, just piece by piece by piece. And I started as a one liner comic early on. Mitch Hedberg, Rodney Dangerfield, like I was all about one liners, and I did a bunch of one liners, and then over time, develop them into bigger bits. And then now longer stories and things, but it all started with understanding what is the joke? What is the mechanism of how you set someone up to then create the punch line that's a surprising misdirect. And that's still the foundation of how I write today. So it's creating those habits early on in your career that will help you develop that much faster. But you have to be willing to actually do that extra work and most people don't want to they just want to be cool, you know, and get a drink ticket and hang out and bum a cigarette. It's whatever you want to do. But just know if you want to do comedy, as your job, you need to start treating it as your job as soon as possible.
Shay 14:10
Yeah, I love that. And during that time, of 11 years, of really growing as a stand up, how did you set goals through that process? I say this because I've took a few months break from stand up, I needed it. Then coming back I'm like, "What am I doing this for?" Like I could write jokes continuously and perform new jokes at open mics. I can do that. But I think a goal for me right now is to take my set from Lace's class and continue to practice that at different open mics. So I can edit them just a little bit or add a little bit here and there. And so I'm like, "Okay, now I have a goal that I'm practicing this set and trying to get comfortable with that onstage." Because that's what I want to focus on is being comfortable on stage. So I think that's helped me just get back into it and have a focus. So was there certain goals that you set during that process? How did you do that?
Joel Byars 15:13
What really helped me, and I'll still do this, is I'll set a goal for the set. So something I've noticed is that if I try too many things, if I'm like, "I want to do this new joke, and this new joke, and this new joke", and then I end up not doing any of them or end up flubbing a line and then losing all confidence, and then crawling through the set. If I try to do too many new things, in a set, then I end up doing none of them. But I started to set goals for my sets that I want to try this new tag on this joke. And in this five minutes set, as long as I say this one line, everything could bomb. But if I get that one line out, I count that as a success. So I would set incremental goals like that. I remember, I would set goals on what do I want to focus on. So for a while, I was like, "I just want to do comedy with the mic in the stand." Because I noticed I was doing a lot of just like distracting movement that had no motivation behind it. So I was like, "I'm going to perform at the mic in the stand, I want to get better at slowing down on stage." And I remember a veteran comic told me that young comics always forget to breathe when they're on stage. So I made it my goal to get better at breathing on stage. And there were literal shows like open mics, now I'm not at a comedy club doing this. But it was an open mic on a Monday at a bar at 11:30. I was like, "I'm just gonna work on this." And my goal was to work on breathing. So literally before and after each joke, I took an audible breath. I literally said a joke (breathes in and out) and then took a breath out loud. I mean, it's an open mic so whatever I'm here to just develop. So I would literally focus on just breathing, I would do a joke (breathes in and out) and then audibly breathe, do the next joke, audibly breathe, and really would make that my goal for several sets to get better at breathing. We're all so aspirational and we have these big goals and a vision of, "I want a Netflix special or what not", but start where you are. And if, right now, you need to type a five minute set, well then do everything in your power to just get that goal of a tight five minutes set together, and then build on top of it from there. So it all starts with just small, incremental, attainable goals to build the confidence that you can then parlay into bigger opportunities. But it all starts with where you are.
Shay 17:41
I love that. I love that so much. What were a couple of resources that you use to learn? You mentioned you bought a couple books, was it a lot of other stand ups as well, you mentioned the veteran stand up. How did you really get that outside information?
Joel Byars 17:58
That's so funny. As comedians we just go headfirst into comedy. We're like obsessed with it. So it's learning anywhere and everywhere, which is kind of how my podcast started. Because there wasn't a dense, educational resource for comedians. It was more like, "There's a little bit over here, there's all these books that you can guess which ones are worth getting. There were some YouTube videos." But like when I started, it was Greg Dean's Step by Step to Stand Up. It was a book based about how to write one liners. It was just the fundamentals. How do you look at a joke under a microscope, and just write it in a way that's gonna get laughs and I some my favorite jokes have come from doing those exercises. So I started with that book. There's a New York comedian named Ben Rosenfield, who I stumbled upon maybe on YouTube, who was showing the evolution of one of his jokes. He was doing an act out of his mom. And he showed the evolution of it. And I was like, "Interesting." So I emailed him and asked him questions, and he was happy to answer. And it was also asking questions at shows to other comedians. Now, a lot of times, comedians will be at an open mic, and then they'll get advice after their set. And it's from another open mic-er who may just be drunk. Whether your advice, whether you're taking a class, or whatever, look at the source. Because I've had comics reach out to me, like, "So and so said this to me at an open mic. What does that mean?" I was like, "Well, so and so has been doing the same jokes for six months, and they only go as a social outlet. They're not there to develop." So when you get advice, look at the source and is this someone you aspire to be? Are they putting in the work? Or are they just bloviating about how you should be doing better to distract from the fact they should be doing better? I've never been afraid to ask questions, whether I'm out at shows and things like that, and I'm always open to listening as well. So it's just being a sponge to anything and everything. So it started out with some YouTube and some books, and just asking fellow comics for advice, and it grew from there.
Shay 20:13
Yeah, that's very interesting. We need to be selective about the people we listened to at these open mics.
Joel Byars 20:20
Just look at the source. Everyone has an opinion now more than ever, especially about comedy. Look at where it's coming from. And that'll help kind of validate whatever that feedback is.
Shay 20:33
Yeah, definitely. Thank you for sharing those resources. I'm gonna check some of them out.
Joel Byars 20:39
I mean, the best resource out there is Hot Breath podcast.
Shay 20:42
Yeah, absolutely.
Joel Byars 20:42
I don't even want to front. But at this point, over 400 interviews with comedians, the YouTube channel has full length interviews, short form clips, you can literally just search comedy writing, how to perform, how to book a show. It's what the people say. But it started as, "what do I wish existed?" and then I built it from there. Because there hasn't been a resource for comedians, it's kind of been all over the place. So I really want Hot Breathe to be a one stop shop for comedians to learn the craft, to connect with each other, and for comedy fans to learn how the sausage is made. I don't want to brag, but I'm super jazzed with what Hot Breath has become. And I'm just so honored that it's all community based that it is for comics by comics. And when I started comedy, it was very negative and competitive. And I didn't get booked on the cool shows and I wasn't at the cool table and in the in crowd, and I just want to get on stage and get as good as possible. That's all I cared about. And Hot Breath, the community behind it, the struggles I had, I'm hoping this next generation doesn't have so it's very positive and supportive and inspiring and has writing prompts. And you can ask questions and things. Because comedy is hard enough as it is. But if you feel like you don't want to go to this show, because so and so may be there or something like that, then it's like, comedy is hard enough to even get out and do it. So the less other distractions and negativity you can have on your journey, the better. So that's kind of why hot breath exists to be that positive outlet. And it's working. Oh, I love it. I love it, honestly.
Shay 22:35
Yeah. Well, I want to ask more about that. You mentioned, interviewed over 400 comedians, you started it three years ago?
Joel Byars 22:43
I think it was five years ago now. Because it started as a season. There were 11 comics on Last Comic Standing. And I was like, "Oh, man, this would be a good time capsule for Atlanta comedy to interview all these people on Last Comic Standing." So then after that I took a break because I was like, "Well, I don't even know what this is anymore." And then I over thought, what else it would be and I was like, "No, just keep interviewing comedians." It grew from that of wanting to showcase Atlanta comedy and now it's grown into this global comedy community.
Shay 23:22
So your intention at first, you just had a first season with 11 guests. How did you continue that? Did you set intentions for it to be this huge community based platform? Or what were the intentions for setting it like you said, you started it because you wanted this positive environment in comedy, but I mean, intentions as in goals, as in, "Well, I want to build this to be, you know, this big, I want it to make money or whatever."
Joel Byars 23:54
Yeah, the goal was never to be what it is today. The goal was to literally, I've always been such a fan of Atlanta comedy. That's why I never moved. I've had friends who have moved to LA and New York, and they did the whole sleeping on couches, and then work their way up. And now they've been on Late Night and all of this. So I've had friends that went that route. But I always wanted to do it from Atlanta. I always loved Atlanta as a city. I love the comedy scene. I just thought there's no better place to develop their shows every single night. There's now more shows than ever, and I just got back from a trip to LA and I can tell you Atlanta comedy is killing it. I was at a show at the Comedy Store just like, "Bruh, Atlanta comedians would crush this compared to a lot of these LA comics." So I've always been a fan of Atlanta comedy. So the show literally started as like capture this moment of Atlanta comedy where a lot of us are on a TV show and ended up winning it. Atlanta comedians actually won it two years in a row and I just wanted to capture this moment for Atlanta comedy. That's literally how it started. And then as I was overthinking what to do next, or season two, social media comedians or whatever, my friend David Perdue, we were talking after a show, and he was like, "Just keep doing interviews", he's like, "Don't overthink the seasonality or whatever, you've been interviewing comedians just keep doing that." So it kind of grew from there. But it's always been what I wish existed every step of the way, the questions I asked, how I do my interviews, they've always been well researched. I've always made sure that I wanted these interviews, even in the early days, I wanted these interviews to be the place to go for this comic. So if you're searching this comic, in a podcast app, or on YouTube, and you see they've done 50 interviews, you click the Hot Breath, one because you know you're going to hear things you won't hear anywhere else. And part of that is me hours and hours and hours and hours of research, and meticulous searching and listening to all their other podcasts, and reading the blogs, and watching their stand up to develop the story behind the comic and really figure out their process and how they do what they do. Which are all the questions I enjoyed hearing on other shows that they didn't go deeper into. My favorite moments on other comedy podcasts were when they do talk about the process. Something that would annoy me is when they would ramble or they will try to out funny each other and it didn't feel like a productive use of time. I didn't feel like I was learning while I was listening. It was more of I was hanging out with them, which is cool. But I don't really consume any content for the sake of let me just kill time. It's how can I make the most out of whatever I'm consuming because your content is part of your diet, for sure. And just like what you eat what you listen to has an effect on you both mentally and physically as well. So I wanted Hot Breath to be that supportive outlet, but also that educational resource that didn't exist at the time. So what it is now in the community, and the online classes and workshops, and the YouTube channel and the shows and things. It all just really started with what I wish existed. And that became the guiding light for every decision I make around it now.
Shay 27:27
I like that it reminds me of my podcast in a way. This one that you're on right now.
Joel Byars 27:33
What?
Shay 27:34
Yeah, just doing research and really asking the questions that I want to ask that I'm curious about.
Joel Byars 27:41
And you know, podcasting is so much work. It's so much work that people don't realize, they get a podcast, it's like, "Oh, you didn't see I was up at 6am re-recording the intro and outro in my closet because I realized that the other intro, the audio was bad." You don't see, up all night editing these episodes, hours of researching, booking guests, uploading it, writing show notes, creating a title, then marketing it. People just think a podcast just appears for their convenience. But there's a lot of work that goes behind it. And there's a crazy stat that it's over 70% of podcasts have less than 10 episodes or something like that. And what you've done with this, which is why I was so excited to be on here is it is passion driven, and it's purpose driven. So you're doing it for a reason deeper than just, "Oh, everyone else has a podcast, I better get one." That's not a recipe for longevity, because I can tell you as my podcast with over 400 episodes. I mean, it's still just steadily growing. There isn't this, "oh, boom, we made it", it's still been this steady grind. And I've still had to have those moments of like, "What am I doing? Do I need to try something else? Should I take a break?" Like all of that self doubt creeping in, because it is a weekly, every single Monday 8am, there's another podcast coming out. It is important for if people are listening to this and want to pursue stand up or create their own podcast or whatever their endeavor is to make sure that the motivation behind it is authentic, because there's going to be a lot of ups and downs that the cool factor of it is gonna wear off real quick.
Shay 29:31
What do you do in those moments of self doubt of like, "Should I take a break? Should I do something differently?" How do you know if you actually do need to take a break or do something differently?
Joel Byars 29:44
Yeah, well, I've taken a break. What's crazy is, the pandemic affected everyone but, I was about to be on the road more than I've ever been on the road as a headliner. My goal, I want to be a touring headliner, and I was literally about to do that in 2020 and then it all disappeared overnight. And then it started to come back a little bit comedy, and then a variant hit and I caught my mental health collapsing. So for the first time in my career I took an entire month off and I started therapy, and I started to really reassess: what am I doing, and why am I doing it, and where's the stress coming from. It's listening to yourself, honestly, and being honest and true with yourself to know that if you take a break, you're not a failure, it's not a reflection. All these negative things you're saying to yourself, people aren't saying. They're not coming from anywhere, but yourself. So it's honestly just that self awareness is what has helped me in those low moments when I accidentally deleted my YouTube channel, trying to change it, I tried to rebrand it one time, into like, "I'll make it the podcast channel." But instead, I ended up accidentally deleting it. And I was on the floor in the fetal position, just like, "Oh, my gosh, what have I done?" And like, you know, allowing myself to feel that and to be in that moment, but to not live in that moment and to really makes sure I bounce back. And the best thing that helps me get out of those moments is like, "Okay, what can I control in this moment?" I mean, a lot of the times, when we are down, it can be driven by things that are out of our control anyway. So I always have to remind myself of like, "Well, is this in my control? If not, what is in my control?" You know, you can't control what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it. So I always try to eventually get to the positive side of things, maybe allow myself to be in that moment of sulking but not really make that last longer than, sometimes when we bomb, we want to make a week out of it and be like, "Oh, I bombed, I bombed, and all four people at that open mic." It's just making the most of it looking at the positive side. What can you do differently next time? How can you improve on what you're currently struggling with? And just make sure it's all within your control. It probably took me eight years and a comedy to start focusing on what I could control. For so long I was like, "Why is so and so booking this show that I've never contacted the booker for, but they should just know me because I'm me?" Or, "Why are they on the road?" Or, "Why isn't this club replying to me?" All these things are out of my control. So as soon as I started focusing on what I could control, I started getting more opportunities and I started to find more success. But it all started with "what can I control" and really making my decisions based around that. But I don't have it figured out, it's still a day-to-day thing for me. There's still ups and downs and highs and lows. And I still have to remind myself of these things. So me saying them is not, I'm not trying to like be preachy about it. But it's also almost saying it out loud as a reminder to me as well, because nobody is immune to the highs and lows of life. And it's just remembering what you can control and being grateful for that is what has helped me.
Shay 33:30
Yeah, I love that, the practice of it. You mentioned self awareness. I know there are so many emails that I've sent out and be like, "well, they didn't email me back for a week" or this or that. And it's like, I've learned that I'm going to send it out. And that's all I can do. If I get a reply back, awesome. If it's a no, that's fine. But yeah, learning how to kind of control your emotions when those things happen, and realizing that it's not the end of the world if you get a no or you don't get a reply. When you send an email off, go do something else. Stop thinking about that email or that conversation or whatever that opportunity because I really think opportunities are waiting for you. You're not waiting for the opportunities. I'm not going to sit here and opportunities are going to come. I put in the work and I'm going to meet the opportunity.
Joel Byars 34:30
Of course. Yeah and the work will lead you to those opportunities for sure. You being willing to put in the work, I'd be on stage every single night. The number one piece of advice I got early on, and what's crazy now all these interviews I've done, the number one piece of advice is still "get on stage". That's still the number one thing, "Get on stage. You have to get on stage." You have to, there's no way around. You can do all the other stuff. But if you're not on stage, that's really where you learn the language of comedy. And you've got to be willing to do it a lot. I mean, there's a reason people like Mark Normand are still grinding out in the New York scene. You always hear them saying, "still going from mic to mic to mic to mic", because that's just part of how you develop as a comedian. And you got to be willing to do that if it is a Tuesday and you got to be up for work at seven, and this open mic is going to 1:00am. Are you willing to do it? When I worked, had a day job, I would work all day and then be at open mics all night, and then just repeat that over and write on my lunch break. Tt was just part of my routine because I knew where I wanted to be. I knew I wanted to make comedy my job. And making this short-term sacrifice will help me long-term in actually achieving that dream. A lot of people, the work isn't worth it to them and that's fine. But for me, I just knew that was really a big part of what was going to help me even if I wasn't, quote, "getting what I deserve", or these opportunities that I knew if I kept working, it would lead to something that would work. And it has.
Shay 36:17
Yeah, I love it. On your website, you say that you want to, "inspire others to take action and pursue their own dreams", which I think we've talked about that just a little bit today. And I just want to ask, when did you start to have that vision to inspire others because you aren't, first day open mic your art onstage like, "Man, I want to do this to inspire others to take action", right? It's not that it's, you get going, you see success, you are leveling up, right? And then you're like, "oh, I see other people not taking action" or, for myself, I'm like, "why am I not taking action on something", you know? And so then I realized, "oh, taking action, dreams are possible", you know, all of these positive things that just a lot of people don't really keep in mind. So when did that first start for you?
Joel Byars 37:13
My parents were also educators. And they always raised me to serve first. Even when my mom was a single mom on a teacher's salary with three kids, we would still donate our time, or we would still donate books, we were still charitable, even if we quote, "didn't have money" or what not. So I think that was just always instilled in me from an early age of serving first. So now when it is coming to my own career, I'm not trying to be a motivational speaker, but more of, just inspire by action inspire by doing. Even if you're not wanting to pursue comedy, it's like you have a day job, but you want to start a jewelry business, or you have a day job you enjoy, and you want to make the most out of it. I think there's so many parallels from just pursuing your passion that can apply to anyone and that's why when people hear the interviews on my podcast, I want them to learn about comedy, but also learn about people who took a chance on themselves and it paid off. And to hopefully, people hear this and feel like, "Oh, maybe I could do that. If I'm hearing all these examples of people taking a chance on themselves and paying off. Maybe I could do that." It could be you want to start your own garden, but you're afraid of what your neighbors are gonna say. It can be at any level. It's not specific to comedy, but I do see comedy is just, there's so many skills you learn pursuing comedy that apply to your life beyond the stage that I think people who don't do comedy can still learn from, and hopefully find inspiration for themselves.
Shay 38:57
Yeah, I love it.
Joel Byars 38:59
Dropping bars out here.
Shay 39:00
Dropping them. Well, you produced your own comedy special. When was it? Last year?
Joel Byars 39:07
I think two years ago now. I did it to be released on my 10 year comedy anniversary. And I started comedy February 1, 2010. So I guess two years ago now.
Shay 39:19
Yeah. So what was it like producing that? Did you have a team helping you at all because you have the filming, you have the audio, the people there, and then marketing, and putting it up on the internet, and all of that. So what was that like it? Did you have help?
Joel Byars 39:38
Yes. Let me talk about setting goals. I was about to come up on my 10 year comedy anniversary. And I was like, "Well, I want to be a successful comedian. What do successful comedians have?" Because a lot of it is we complain about what we don't have without even looking at what we do have. So I had to reflect on, "Okay, well, where do I want to be?" Because I'm telling you at every step of the way, in this comedy journey, there's things that pop up of like, "Well, why am I not further along?" Those thoughts can really creep in at any level. I've interviewed comics 20 years in, who still battle with that self-doubt and stuff. So basically, I set a goal to record an album and release it on my 10 year anniversary, I didn't know how I was going to achieve this. It's kind of like, I set a goal one year to run a marathon. And I was like, "I have no idea how I'm gonna do this. I'm just gonna set the goal and then see what happens." And kind of created a NorthStar to work towards that year. So for this album, I didn't know how or where, with who, or what I just set the goal. And then just through talking about it, I did a fan of Hot Breath, I did his podcast. And then I brought up how I wanted to record an album this year. And he was like, "Well, I do video, we could just record a special." So it went from an album into a special and fortunately, I also knew an audio engineer from another fans' podcast I was on. So I actually had an audio engineer help with the audio, and then my friend, Isaac, do the video and actually have my best friend from high school, he's out in the movie industry in LA now. And I actually flew him out to help film it as well, which was pretty cool.
Shay 39:38
Yeah.
Joel Byars 39:44
And then the venue is called the Basement Theater. Tt was the first place to ever booked me as a headliner. I did a lot of memorable shows there. So I record the special there. It really was a team effort. It really was. Yeah, I mean, even my wife helping me, her putting some touch up on me before the show, maybe a little concealer or something. It really was a team effort that all started with, "I want to do this. I don't know how." And then, just like you said, the opportunities are looking for you. So it kind of like, "I want to do this. Okay." And then the opportunities started to appear that would help me achieve that
Shay 42:07
By just talking about it.
Joel Byars 42:09
Mmhhmm. Yeah, for sure.
Shay 42:10
Yeah, I think some people are scared to talk about what they want. It's funny, because sometimes we talk about something and we don't do it. Right. But then sometimes we really want something and then we're afraid to talk about it. And so nobody is ever like, "Oh, I can help you with this thing that you never talk about." It's definitely helpful to get it out there. And just sure you have the intention to follow through with it.
Joel Byars 42:37
Of course, yeah. And it was self-produced. And the whole motivation was, again, showing other comics, you don't have to wait for someone's approval to create your own special or album. And just showing other people as well. If you want it, create it yourself at whatever means you're at. Now, I had Barry Katz on the podcast, and he watched a clip from my special. If people don't know who Barry Katz is, he's probably the most legendary comedy manager in the industry. He's worked with literally everyone. Dane Cook. Dave Chappelle. Literally everyone. So he actually watched the clip, and then roasted it and then boasted it. He gave me a real reaction to like, "Here's what I liked. Here's what I didn't like. Here's what could be better." He really gave me a real honest feedback on it, which I really appreciated. And yeah, it's not perfect, but I wanted it to be the raw reality of comedy. I think we watch a lot of comedy specials now, and it's super polished and it's in this huge theater, and they recorded it eight times to get this one video you're seeing. For me it's one take. We didn't have a camera set up on stage. So I walked out the big intro and then realize this camera wasn't set up so we had to reset everything and be like, "Alright guys, act like that didn't happen." I left that in. I forgot my jokes at one point. I left that in. My dog makes an appearance. I left all these real and raw moments because that's really what comedy is. Steve Martin says, "comedy isn't pretty", and it's raw, and it's authentic. And I wanted this special to really create that experience for people that I don't think they get from watching most comedy specials.
Shay 44:27
Yeah, it is very polished or with these other comedians, and then you see a cut, and it's like, "Wait, where did that come from?" Or it's like, "Oh, these people in the front row are different people." And I'm like, "Oh, okay, I thought this is all one thing, but that's cool."
Joel Byars 44:46
Yeah, it's comedy magic and it can be tough. We see on social media or whatever and we only see it from what we assume it is. But there's so many behind the scenes things going on with anything we see that we should just take it for what it is. If you're an up and coming comedian and you see a comedy special like that, and you're like, "Well, geez, how would I ever get there?" Even a clip of it with all these cool effects and subtitles, and you're like, "Well, how am I supposed to do this on, like, iMovie, shot on my iPhone?" It is starting with where you are, and just doing your best with what you have and building it from there. My podcast started on borrowed equipment. I was recording my intros and outros on my closet, and it took an hour to record an intro and outro of a podcast. Those are all the moments, just be grateful for them and grateful for where you are. And then you'll just be grateful for everything you get beyond that. It exceeds expectations beyond that.
Shay 45:59
I love that and I just got chills from hearing that. I just love that you keep going back to like starting where you are, because then you will discover more and more. And I've been making comedy sketches for my Instagram, and TikTok recently, and I've really enjoyed it. And I've had to write and record and edit. And there are some things that I've learned in the past week that I never would have learned if I didn't start making them however long ago.
Joel Byars 46:29
For sure.
Shay 46:30
I wouldn't learn that my first week. I'll learn that on the 52nd week. Right, but you never will know that if you don't start.
Joel Byars 46:39
Exactly, which is the hardest part. It's all momentum. Starting. Getting on stage for the first time. You think about it, you watch it, you're like, "Oh, yeah, I could do that." But are you? Are you doing it? Are you up there yet? It's overcoming that initial hurdle and breaking that fear barrier that's going to help all the other ones be easier to overcome.
Shay 47:00
Totally. Yes. So I have a couple more questions left.
Joel Byars 47:05
Yay.
Shay 47:06
Two left. One that I ask every guest. I'm super interested, what is one thing you're doing to level up right now?
Joel Byars 47:16
Gosh, two come to mind, I want to say therapy and meditation. Maybe that's kind of together. I've been meditating for over two years now. But I think therapy was a big game changer for me, because I think I was just assuming everything was the way it is and that's how it's gonna be. And there was just so much negative self-talk. During the pandemic, I went live, I went live over 400 days in a row doing this daily writing competition. There were so many funny mental breakdowns, but I had one where I literally started crying, and I was like, "I gotta get out of here", and I was like, "Maybe I do need, maybe professional help would be a good idea." So I think starting therapy just gave me like, it's not as woowoo or whatever you tell yourself about what therapy is and how it's not for you, or even you don't have problems. It's cool just to have a professional sounding board that isn't Twitter. Someone you can bounce off of and really get professional perspective on what it is you're trying to work through. Because with social media, it feels like we're connected, but more distant than ever. So it's good. And it's been just wow, yeah, I would say right now probably therapy is the biggest thing that's helped me get more grounded, get more intentional about what I do, get more grateful about what I'm doing, and it's helped improve my relationships as well. The lifestyle of a comedian is you're out a lot and you're gone a lot. And that's tough because I do value family, I do value quality time. Family is super important that's how I was raised that was the anchor of everything as well. So even if I do have to be gone, when I'm here, I want to be all the way there. I want to be all the way there with my family when I'm there and therapy helped me to recognize that and to recognize maybe what temptations are that distract me from that and even on the career side. So it's really helped me become a more well-rounded person, a more self aware person.
Shay 49:33
Yeah.
Joel Byars 49:34
I can't recommend it enough. I've only had positive experiences with it. I'm sure other people, maybe they've tried to find someone and they haven't found that right connection yet. I fortunately tried the first person I tried and ended up clicking and that was great. But I think for people who maybe have had a negative experience with it, not give up on it and try to find someone that it is a good fit for you because it is personal and there's a very intimate relationship you're creating with someone very quickly. So you want to make sure it's a comfortable environment for you. But it's definitely worth the search. It has been a game changer for me for sure.
Shay 50:12
I started therapy during the pandemic as well. It is one of those things that makes you well rounded. It's not like, "I'm doing this for comedy." No, it's for your life and your relationships, like you said, and a relationship, for me, with myself.
Joel Byars 50:32
Yeah.
Shay 50:33
Right? And like, how I react, how I show up, how I treat certain people. And I'm like, "Oh, I thought they were doing something to me, but it looks like I'm doing something to them." (laughs) Right. That's kind of what it is, right. I have these problems. These people make me mad. Well, why do they make you mad? And why do you lash out? That's my experience with it.
Joel Byars 50:59
Oh, yeah, it's all true and it's all these questions. You either don't think to ask about or you're afraid to ask or you're afraid to answer that it gives you a safe space to explore those. I agree with what you're saying. I can relate to that, for sure.
Shay 51:16
Okay. So where can we support you, find you on social media, where can we go?
Joel Byars 51:22
So the podcast is called Hot Breath and it's available on all podcast platforms and on YouTube. The YouTube channels really where I'm pushing it this year, we're almost to 20,000 subscribers, and I'd like to get to 50 this year. Yeah, another goal. I don't know how we're gonna get there, you know, but it's a moonshot I set for this year. And we'll see how we get there. But I live stream on there three times a week, you know, posting episodes and interviews and clips as well. So I would say the YouTube channel is the best place to go. But to support me directly. My comedy special that we talked about, called The Trophy Husband is available on my website, JoelByarsComedy.com. And it's by donation, but it's a self produced DIY special. And another thing I was seeing was all these comics putting it on YouTube, and I was like, "Well, what happens if I just sell it? And people can donate what they want? And do it that way?" So I'm always looking for what is the inverse of what people are doing? Like, "Okay, what's cool right now? What's the wave? And then maybe what's the next wave?" So I was testing out selling it on my website, and people have been purchasing it. And I really appreciate it, and my wife really appreciates it. But that's available at JoelByarsComedy.com, J-O-E-L-B-Y-A-R-S. And you can check out the special there. And all social media is @JoelByarsComedy and @HotBreathPod.
Shay 52:51
Cool. Thank you. And I will put all of those links in the show notes. And on the show page, so people can check that out.
Joel Byars 52:58
Yet another piece of work people don't realize when they listen to a podcast, and they hear, "Oh, they said they're gonna put the links in the show notes but they didn't." "Oh, maybe because they recorded it two months ago and totally forgot and just pasted show notes in." Another piece of work people don't think about in podcasting is the show notes and going and adding each link and remembering which ones you said, and, "I referenced this book, I better put a link to that." I just want to give you your flowers, Shay.
Shay 53:29
Thank you.
Joel Byars 53:29
Because what you're doing is helping people but it's also a lot of work. So I just want people to realize, she said "link in there" that's more work she's doing for you all out there to help you level up so be grateful and share this episode.
Shay 53:43
Yeah. Thank you for that. Thank you. Yeah. And these show pages that maybe nobody will see on a website with transcription that I just started transcribing the podcasts the second season.
Joel Byars 53:57
Oh, snap.
Shay 53:59
So trying to make it more available to more people.
Joel Byars 54:02
Good for you. I've been wanting to do that and I've been wanting to be more active. I would love to have a website for the podcast and there is one but it could be better. Also, we all want to do so many things. It's kind of like picking one at a time and eating an elephant one bite at a time. You know what I mean?
Shay 54:20
Yeah.
Joel Byars 54:20
Because I can get shiny object syndrome and I can be all over the place. But I've been trying to be more disciplined and intentional about just one thing at a time.
Shay 54:31
We could literally have another podcast episode about that because yes, I also have shiny object syndrome. That's SOS.
Joel Byars 54:41
(laughs) I've never heard that. I love that.
Shay 54:47
Right now, on the pod. Okay, so last question. What is a piece of advice you would give to aspiring comedians and artists who may feel lost if they have no specific direction? They're seeking answers and they have big dreams.
Joel Byars 55:04
Well, I want to I want to say something I haven't said yet, because I've talked about focusing on what you can control and putting in the work and things like that. But I think something that I haven't said is to follow what excites you. I've tried so many things, just because other people were doing them or because something was working for them that, "Oh, maybe I want to post a bunch of grainy crowd work clips on TikTok to go viral." Oh, well, or maybe that's not how you would want to be discovered if it did go viral? Is that what you want to be known for? If it is go for it. But I think just focusing on what's fun to you, and choosing your projects, and your creative endeavors or professional endeavors, with what excites you, what brings you the most joy? Because I mean, I think the pandemic taught us life is short, and it's delicate, and it is fragile. And it can just change literally overnight. I think we all experienced that. So now more than ever, it's just focusing on what brings you the most excitement and joy, because whatever it is, it's going to be a lot of work, it's going to be more work than you expect. So you want to make sure that it's fueled by fun. Fueled by fun, whoa, we got merch drop coming up, fueled by fun.
Shay 56:28
(laughs)
Joel Byars 56:28
But I think it's just making sure whatever you decide to do that, if you want to do skits, doing skits with people that are fun, and that bring you joy, and that energize and inspire you, and whatever you do creatively, just making sure that it actually builds you up instead of breaks you down and makes you feel negative or self doubt, because it's not doing as well as such and such version of that. Do what brings you joy. Focus on doing things that bring you joy and that are fun and the opportunities will come from that.
Shay 57:08
Yeah, I love that. I recently just talked to someone about that on an episode of like, "What are you interested in right now?" Because if you are going to these external people and seeing what they're doing and what's working, then you'll do all that and then you'll look back and you'll be like, "Wait, wasn't even doing what I wanted to do. I was seeking something of seeking to go viral or attention. And I wasn't actually enjoying what I was doing."
Joel Byars 57:37
Oh, yeah. That was top of mind to me, because I literally just had this revelation hit me twice in the same week. I interviewed Jeremiah Watkins and he's a comedian who's doing so many things. And I asked him, like, "How do you decide what to do?" Because he just had a kid and I was just like, "How do you decide what to do? And oh, it's worth it." He's like, "I literally now," especially since he had a kid, he's like, "I only do things that are fun, or with fun people." And that's really how he decides. things. And that really stuck with me. And I was with a comedian, friend of mine, who is now very big on social media. And he's like, he's selling out shows and things like that. And he was telling me, he does a certain, I'm not gonna blow up his spot, but he does a certain style of video. It's kind of a trend right now. It's like whatever you want to be. I've tried it a few times. And it just didn't feel fun and what not. I was like, "Oh, man, you're killing it. You're doing this and that" He's like, "Man, I hate doing these videos." He said every time he records them, he's like, "Oh, let me go ahead and do 10 of these really quick." He literally doesn't enjoy it. And from the outside, I'm like, "Oh, he's killing it. He's going viral. He's selling tickets." But he literally hates what he's become known for on social media. So that's why I said that thing about the grainy crowd work clips and things like that. We see a lot of comics doing this right now and that's fine and go for it. And I can't even imagine trying to start comedy now to on top of developing and becoming a good comedian. You're now a video editor. You're now a marketer, all these different things I didn't have to worry about so I can't even imagine now. It's a whole other game out there. Doing what makes you inspired and happy and what brings you joy and energy and that's fun. Because I've seen it at every single level and that's a common thing for people that are either happy with their careers or not. Someone not further along quote may be happier than the someone who is poppin' off because for whatever reason. Focus on what's fun and let the opportunities build from that.
Shay 59:49
Yes. I love it.
Joel Byars 59:52
Fuel your fun.
Shay 59:54
What was it? Feel your fun?
Joel Byars 59:57
Fueled by fun. That feels like some spray brush shirt someone would buy at Daytona Beach. That's what it feels like.
Shay 1:00:06
Yeah. Fueled by fun with nitrous and I don't know what else.
Joel Byars 1:00:12
Whatever these kids are doing.
Shay 1:00:13
Yeah, I don't know (laughs)
Joel Byars 1:00:12
I'm in my mid-30s. I've hung up the hat. I mean, give me too many coffees and heavens to Betsey. A big night for me is popping a melatonin and seeing how late I can stay up. That's how crazy it gets now. (laughs)
Shay 1:00:14
That's your drug of choice now.
Joel Byars 1:00:14
It is. "Popping melis" is what I call it.
Shay 1:00:17
(laughs) Melis. I love it. I love it. Well, this has been so much fun and I've gotten so much out of it. So I know so many other people will. Thank you so much for doing this Joel.
Joel Byars 1:00:42
Of course. Thanks for having me, Shay. I love what you're doing and I love comedians who are, like you said, taking action. We all think and have ideas but to see people actually execute on them. I love supporting anyone that does that. So yeah, thank you for what you're doing.
Shay 1:00:59
Yeah. Thank you. And thank you to all of you who are listening. This is Level Up! With Shay and we will see you next week.
(outro) Thank you so much for listening to today's episode. If anything that Joel said today resonated with you please share this episode on Instagram and tag me at @levelupwithshay and tag Joel. Go follow Joel on social media, subscribe to his YouTube channel, and check out his podcast Hot Breath anywhere you listen to podcasts. All of the links you need to find him are in the show notes. Subscribe to Level Up! With Shay wherever you get your podcasts. Again, thank you so much for being here. It's time to level up!
